prease

please.

please don't breach this trust i have in you.

please don't spread this blog.

please don't expose this harbour of mine to the scrutiny of public.

for now, i don't want my enemies, my admirers, or those who wanna check me out to know about this blog. that's why i only tell those whom i trust. it is an honour, a trust. if you found out this blog by accident, then perhaps it is fate. but DON'T SPREAD. the more people who know about this blog, the more unwilling i am to share my honest views and reveal my true feelings

and i don't like it when people talk about the content of my blog openly and blatantly.

you might be wondering why don't i keep it in a personal diary if i want certain privacy.
well, sometimes i juz wanna share. and sometimes i think that people around me should know how i feel. to understand me better.

after all, i am considered a "guai lan", "eccentric", "crazy" person, by normal standard of this society. i live by my own rules, and i am happy about that. i do what i like, and i say what i like. when i am very happy, i will jump around and tell everyone that i am happy. is that not normal? i juz feel that i am in fact much more normal, much less self-repressed than others. and i am who i am . i am who i show. no facade. anyway, why should i give a damn to pretend to be a person that the world likes, why should i put a mask and not be proud of my own face.

i like my inner self. my original self. i like myself.

that's why i like Osho. go read about "The Book of Man" by Osho. make great sense, juz that you might find him a little extreme.


"My vision of the new man is of a rebel, of a man who is in search of his original self, of his original face. A man who is ready to drop all masks, all pretensions, all hypocrisies, and show to the world what he, in reality, is Osho perceives man as becoming increasingly alienated from his inner self, gradually losing his natural innocence and creativity in the mindless quest for worldly power and success. To appear strong, the average man suppresses his innate qualities of love and compassion, thus widening the chasm within. For Osho, the ideal man is Zorba, the Buddha?a perfect blend of matter and soul. Inherently rebellious, this `New Man' experiences no division between the outer and the inner self. And, because he lives naturally and consciously without any guilt or conflict, he can claim the whole world as his own."
Osho






Reflections
When I look at my reflection
Do I see me or dishonest rejection
Is this what I am supposed to believe
Or an image I want to perceive

Do I know and love my life as me
Or do I pretend to make fallacy
Why can't I believe in what I am
Is there a love I don't understand

It shouldn't matter what they think
I must never let myself sink
I do many things for everyone
Shouldn't I do more, for my fun

Treating myself with a little affection
Will brighten my own reflection
The time for me is today
I'm changing to do things my way

Life, it seems to reflect on
It creates images coming on the pond
Is it important for me to reflect clear?
I really care and that's why I'm here
~~~~~~
Donovan - 1990

On a lighter note, i like this photo