here is something i got some timo's blog...i quite share the same sentiment as well...

"there's a kind of emptiness behind every joy and laughter.
a type of sorrow that can never be expressed in mere words.
happiness will never last for eternity, if it had even existed in the first place.
many are just blinded by the facade that they are actually very happy,
and yet, i'm glad that i'm one of them alright.
shows that i'm human.

friends? they will never stay at ur side 4ever.
an impossible dream that is.
u may call me naive, but,
i'd always loved company of friends.
i'd even let my imagination go wild,
that one day, with good faith, my good friends and i will will stay together in this big house.
haha. how childish.

i dun really know how others think of me.
must have been really irresponsible and mean at times.
yet, some will never complain when they have grievances.
for that i thank u right from my heart.

perhaps it's this self-isolation in me that makes me want to do my best to engage in more social activities.
how foolish, i was, to think of alleviating the situation.
it will never work.
as much as i try to enjoy wadever activities i'm doing,
there are always some who despise me. who ignore me.
who think them i'm negligible in that place and time.

sure some outings are fun, but it is only a matter of time that they will be over.
just like how 灏忛緳濂?felt when no one was around, when even 鍛ㄤ集閫?left her.
tears will just fill up ur eyes like bottomless wells,
and the emptiness in ur heart will become unbearable.
if that's the case, why indulge in temporary, false happiness?"